Relationships, Marriage, Purpose, Passions, Parenthood

Friday, June 19, 2009

Celibacy in College

by Tamara F.

College can be and most often is the most fun, exciting carefree times in a person’s life. Things can get very crazy and exciting: the parties, the barbecues, spring break, crazy roommates, boyfriends and girlfriends, and lots and lots of casual sex. Most of us have been there and know exactly what I am talking about. Sex is just a part of the college culture whether we like to admit it or not. If you are not having it, you are deemed a conquest, abnormal, or probably a “Jesus freak”. As a woman who decided to take the path of celibacy, I was met with those assumptions.
I decided to take this path after realizing that having sex can seriously complicate a relationship, and I was tired of residing in a place of not knowing how I was being perceived by my significant other. I had plenty of guy friends who would tell me stories about being with a girl just so that they'd have a steady flow of sex in their lives, even though they could care less that girl, was messing around with a slew of others and would oftentimes dog her behind her back to his friends because she was not a girl that he cared about. Then I had tons of girlfriends who would just have casual sex all the time just to secure a date! When I say date I don’t mean dinner and movies, but just someone to call company, be it in their dorm rooms or at 3am at his apartment. They were looking for the type of love or approval that you will NEVER get by bed hopping.
I did not want this to be me.

The easiest solution I had, was not to put myself in that position any longer. I would know that my guy is truly there for me once he put that ring on my finger and declared me as his and only his forever until death, yes… FOREVER.

Celibacy can be a beautiful thing, especially while living in the midst of all the craziness that college has to offer, the good times and bad. By taking a vow of celibacy, you quickly decrease the bad. You easily eliminate some of the most difficult issues that college can hand to a person; unplanned pregnancies and possible abortions, STDs, bad reputations, life changing secrets for the future etc. So much like myself, I would suggest those who are in college to do themselves this favor, and just make life a tad bit easier and find a new hobby :)


Meet our intern Tamara Ferguson, a recent graduate of San Diego State University. Tamara earned a BA in Women’s Studies and is pursuing a law degree. In San Diego, Tamara was active in service organizations that targeted women, including JC’s Girls an outreach ministry to women who are looking for support as they exit the adult entertainment industry. We are so happy to have Tamara with us. We're sure she'll go on to change the world!